Did you have a bad day too?

Today is cd3. This time, we are going to try it without the clomid. We have been reading a lot of articles about how it can thin your uterine lining and be a harsh environment for sperm. So no clomid this time.

Friday, my mother in "law" came over and we had dinner and watched the presidential debates (go Obama!). She knows we are trying to conceive and has been pretty helpful. We get a lot of free pregnancy tests from her office (she is an OBGYN nurse). So she asked if we were pregnant and we told her the test was negative. She gave KB a hug and asked her how she was doing. Later, on our way out to dinner, she noticed my moping around and asked if I "had a bad day too." Instantly, I snapped back that this is my potential baby too and that it was just as hard on me to find a negative result. Yikes. It looks like I have discovered one of my sensitive areas about this whole pregnancy deal.

I never pictured myself in the "dad" role. Although, many of our straight friends have told us that nobody ever asked the male counterpart what they were feeling about being pregnant or how they were doing, I never even thought that this would be a similar situation for us.

Even among those that love us and are supportive, we find old biases creeping on up. I guess it is just really hard for even the most understanding of people to completely comprehend two women having a baby together...you just don't get it until you are doing it. In some respects, I think I always knew that this would be a "different kind of pregnancy" and that others might see it differently.

All I want is to have a family without my biological sex being an issue for that. And if my wife is having a hard time, you bet I am going to be having a hard time as well...

Mom-in-law apologized later and said that she sees me as the "strong" one because she knows her own daughter and how KB deals with hurt. Since I don't wear my emotions on my sleeve as much, I guess that was interpreted as not having a hard time with TTC. Although, I don't think that was the only thing contributing to that comment.

The battle never ends.