the back story

So I realized that I never fully discussed the background for our "baby story." My wife and I met and fell in love quickly. We moved-in together before being together for a year. We were engaged on our 1 year anniversary...and married 14 months later. Before she came around, I was utterly afraid of committment...it just was not my cup of tea. I was in and out of relationships faster than you could say, "be my girlfriend?" And I did not like to have discussions about "defining relationships"...they made me anxious. Then along came KB. She was pretty and blonde, I am dark and mysterious...she was quirky, I am nerdy...she was spontaneous, I like things planned and organized...she was funny, and I like to think that I am but have been informed that this is not true. We are so different, and yet so much alike. And I knew pretty quickly that I wanted to keep this one...for as long as the universe will let me.

A week before I moved in, we bought our first baby...bailey (scroll down to bottom of page). He is a 17 lb half-yorkie/half-poodle and all ass-hole puppy...and we love him. He was actually our impetus for moving in together. We didn't want him to "be from a broken home." So that was it.

KB and I have been talking about babies since before I moved in. We went to an LGBT family conference, read books, and created timelines. At least 10 of our good friends either have children or are currently pregnant. I started sewing baby clothes over 2 years ago....seriously...we have about 50 different items in our "baby trunk" that I have made. KB is 6 1/2 years my senior...and in the past year...her biological clock has gone from a moderate tick to the sound of a gong. Mine has not been much better. The baby radar goes off every time a pregnant woman enters my 1/2 mile radius....which is constant since I live in a large urban city...across from a children's park no-less.

So why now? Besides all of the preparation that has gone into this...we have at least five more reasons...(I like lists)

1) KB isn't getting any younger and we would both like to carry one before the chances of developmental and physical complications increase.

2) I am applying for my year-long clinical internship (it's like residency for doctors)...which will begin anywhere from 10-12 months from now. If we have the baby before I start, there will be a nice natural break where I can also stay home with the newborn.

3) There is a chance that for said internship, we will be moving across the country and KB will have to get a new job. Wouldn't it be great to start maternity leave before that happens and take advantage of the family medical leave act?

4) Because of the possibility of said potential move...we may have to find another OBGYN in a new city if we wait any longer...NO NO NO NO NO. We like our OBGYNie...a lot.

5) Because when is anyone completely prepared for a baby in all aspects of their lives. If we wait for all the conditions to be perfect...we will be retired. It is time to get on with the show.

So in January of 08, we began the process. We went to a fertility specialist in the area and had some tests done. KB had polyps in her uterus...so she had surgery to prepare the baby's room. Then we were married...then we paid off all our credit card and medical debt and started saving money. Before we knew it, it was August! So we took a few weeks to pick our sperm donor. The first one we picked was perfect. Native-American like me, and in the same field. But alas...he was not available to new customers. So then we picked some others...but they had never had any successful home pregnancies. Then we found Mr. SuperSperm. Apparently, he is the Michael Phelps of sperm donors. We contacted some families that have used him on the DSR and saw pictures of their beautiful beautiful children. And we bought our first round.

The day came to pick up the tank...and it was almost a scene out of some weird and twisted horror film. The doctor (who lives in the same city as us) brought the tank home to her house after work, and we went and picked it up there. We pulled in...behind her condo...into the alley. Got out, and watched her open the tank, which spewed nitrogen gas like some sort of fog machine in a low-budget film. She showed us how to pull out the vials so not to burn our hands...and we buckled the tank into the back seat...imagining the whole way home that it was our baby in it's car seat. We are pathetic!

the night of the first insemination...may have been too soon. Because KB is on clomid, it is hard to detect an LH surge...so we guessed by the quality of her CM. To all my knowledge...she was fertile. It was not as romantic as I would have liked...more of a wham bam thank ya maam kind of deal. And afterwards, she laid in bed with her hips propped up eating an ice-cream sandwhich, while this pseudo gynocologist cleaned up.

And here we are. a week and a half later. We are pretty sure she ovulated on Thursday...she felt some definate ovary pain that day...I wonder what our "magical baby" (there is a story behind this...but it will wait for tomorrow's post) will be...an astronaut or a doctor?!

hmmm....